Nonsense

It’s the weekend and so I should be writing a literary post but I don’t want to—I want write about my favourite subject than literature (and public transit, and cats, and food, and conversations I have eavesdropped on recently), which is nonsense.

In other news, it is very hot and it is easy to mistake the weather for a mood. Here are some things that have also been affecting my mood for good or ill.

Good
—I found a dollar on the sidewalk, and then a few minutes later I found a nickel, and I though perhaps I was on an infinite trail of change—but then that was all I found. Still, $1.05 just for walking to the drugstore. My dad and I were very into “lucky money” (money found on ground) when I was a small kid and I think you never get too big to be charmed by that.
—Are we having the best Ontario cherry season ever in history or am I just making amazing picks every time I go to the grocery store or the market? EITHER WAY!
—Also watermelon.
—Outdoor swimming.
—Sometimes I remember that the word swag is actually an acronym—Stuff We All Get—and it really cheers me up.
—I organized this event for work and it is open to the public (although tickets are rather expensive). If you work at a Magazines Canada member publication, though, it’s free to attend. I worked really hard curating the panels and I think it’s going to be an awesome event.
—We made this silly video on Instagram.

Bad
—I am now too old to just let the merciless sun beat down on my head wherever I go in the summer, and am forced to wear a sunhat when I walk to say, the grocery store or the library. My most convenient sunhat, the one that can folded and jammed in a bag when I arrive at my destination, is both uncool and has a bow on it, as if I were trying to be cool—the worst of both worlds.
—Mark finally slipped up and called me “Evan.” I knew it would happen eventually, but it still felt really bad.

Also

Mark and Rebecca walk to the grocery store on the eve of a swimming date with friends:
RR: Did you ever buy a new bathing suit?
MS: No.
RR: Did you ever find your old bathing suit?
MS: No.
RR: It’s just gone?
MS: Oh, yeah, it’s not coming back. I really looked.
RR: Well, it’s been gone for like 8 months. Don’t you think you should buy a new one?
MS: Maybe. I keep forgetting.
RR: It’s like you want to be nagged.
MS: I really don’t.
RR: But you just don’t do normal human chores.
MS: I do. I do so many of them.
RR: But not all of them. Because now we are going swimming tomorrow and you don’t have a bathing suit.
MS: I’ll just wear my gym shorts, like last time.
RR: Did you wash them? Because remember last time they smelled funny.
MS: I washed them! They were in the wash on Sunday!
RR: Ok.
MS: …
RR: Have you worn them since Sunday?
MS: …yes.
RR: Ooh…I see the problem. I didn’t realize these are your ONLY gym shorts.
MS: They aren’t, I have other gym shorts.
RR: So wear the clean ones to the pool?
MS: No. Because those are cloth and they get really heavy. Only the nylon ones are good to swim in. [Editor’s note: I realized in the moment that nylon is a kind of cloth, and wanted to point it out, but I can only fight on so many fronts at once.]
RR: If you have two pairs of gym shorts but only one is good for swimming in, why didn’t you wear the non-swimming gym shorts to the gym and save the others for tomorrow?
MS: I DON’T KNOW. What’s done is done.
RR: I think you should hand wash your shorts when we get home from the grocery store.
MS: Ok, I’ll consider it.
(he did wash the shorts, and we had a very pleasant and normal swimming experience)